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Hilarious One Liners

Hilarious One Liners

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm

Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have any film.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Wear Short Sleeves: Support your right to bare arms...

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

I intend to live forever - so far, so good

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.

I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week

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